The Word of the Day is “Belief” (For my Wife)

Belief in something as reality or not reality is an illusion… All we know of this world is energy flowing through our various senses… Sight, taste, touch, smell, sound… Nothing but vibrations of matter leaking through us… What is real? The real universe is 99.999999% empty space and yet it seems solid… The real color red is simply the energy the surface of that object rejects… True contact between atoms is impossible, there is a barrier that prevents electrons from touching one another… So what is belief? What is Real? The rejected matter of the world that we absorb? Is Reality gods unwanted children left out of heaven?

Real is a perception of rationalizing the surreal seen through the eyes of humans who forgot that we are our own creator, the only currency is time, the most important moment of your life is the one you are living TODAY, NOW. Real is an interpretation of something so much more grand and wonderful than anything we can possibly imagine… You being HERE, is magical… exactly as you are, perfect, one of gods unwanted souls here to learn about life still until he wants you back. Original sin punished by Karma, bound to earth to fear… Welcomed home when you put down your armor and your weapons, and stop fearing death. How can we stop fearing death, when we are so in love? So I stay here, for you my Wife. Every day, for you and you alone. I save pieces of my friends and give them back when they want them, labor of love, I go to work to check on my dream of showing a violent world non-violent heroes… a dream so misunderstood by so many who can’t beat it out of me and make me stop believing it can exist (A student asks Yoda, Why be a Jedi if you don’t want to fight… Yoda responds: because it is better to be a warrior in a garden than a gardener in a war)…

Belief is the way we rationalize something that can not be seen as a whole… We break it up into little Ants, and we look at every part of the system under a microscope, we miss the hive, we can’t even see the Queen (my queen, you my love)

The rationalization of infinite knowledge abridged and edited and simplified into something the tiny fraction of consciousness that registers through our small insignificant meat machine and quantum microcomputers of a brain can comprehend… And all we know of life, all we evolved to see “out there” is only those things that could have killed us or prevented our survival… all we know of ourselves, is the love we receive in this world due to our impact on it (our way, to attempt no footprint, but make the world better, to pull no one to safety but attempt to shield them from harm), the only thing that makes us not afraid is having the scary things go as soon as we ask them to, you know I never intend to scare anything.

So again… What is belief? Is Magic real, can someone see all the ants 20 years ago, and heard them… With infinite time and infinite space, and infinite patience, Focus, and a belief he can, with a Queen at his side. Yes he can. How did he do it, one piece at a time, slowly building an ANT farm, people kicked it over, the ants moved around the globe together, someone puts water on it, 2 ants replace each one. How do I know, that when I touch something it won’t vanish into dust… The same way I know when I hold my child that it is a part of me… I take down all my defenses, I am pure honestly, pure vulnerability, and I believe in Love…

You made me believe in unconditional love… For the first time in my life… and showed my I hadn’t lost my dream at all. How do I know through all the fractured facets of micro information that my brain processes and simplifies into one simple moment… How do I have faith that it won’t turn to dust when I hold on to that belief as tightly as I can… I believe in the strength of my faith and my unbroken and never wavering resolve to love this life and learn all I can so I may rejoin my goddess in heaven when I die and not be bound to this earth with material things. Then I plan to live each day with you in my soul… My beautiful wife Shona. How do I know you wont shatter when I lean on you? I know because like knowing I am real… Knowing my soul exists… Your strength I need to lean on isn’t just a belief in a trick of the senses… It is a feeling that I know straight to my soul, the knowledge of what is absolute… I believe the earth will not vanish under my feet, and I may take a step based on that belief… I know that this is love… I don’t need the vibrations of the universe to show it to me, my love for you… is the object at rest the “real” that can’t be seen, touched, tasted, heard, smelled… It is not the rejected photons of matter that mainstream through my eyes into my retina cresting a delusion of color. You simply are my wife… I don’t need faith, or belief, to simply Know that it was you the day we met, I just needed to not fear you my Valkyrie, to see you as Equal my Freyja, “There you are” same Chi tattoos and all “Magic”… To be your knight in tattered armor who deserves a Valkyrie. To be your Odr, now tattood forever on you as your octopus corset so many people admire even though it’s a symbol of your love for me and only me, the Sea Monster that still deserved the love of his wife and goddess of Mercy, no matter who didn’t like him or wanted her more. My captain of the Valkyries, goddess of luck, Freyja.. I don’t need to rationalize it… It is.

I hope no one actually ever turns me into a sea monster, if they did, I know you would Stay.

Morning Musings

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