The word of the day is “Serenity”

Some say Serenity is vibration set the extreme which can appear as Mania. the concept that the soul when most focused appears as a whirlwind in a torando, as the Shaolin master speeds through a form that to an outsider appears chaotic but to the monk, is a calculated dance practiced a million times in his head and by his body.

The warrior monk knows no pain in this state, he knows no fear, no doubt… Those who are not disciplined in the martial arts drift through life believing time is dragging them along the timeline with no concept of control over the future. The idea of boredom to a Shaolin, is a failure to use your time… for the meditating shaolin there is a moment between awake and asleep where the mind collapses in on itself, into a state of nirvana where one greets the soul and finds his true heart and the Buddha cosnciousness can channel straight through to our soul. The heart of a warrior is one of power and strength, and the desire to never need to use it… A soul that when times stops, sees probability not as paranoia or delusion but as a delightful possible reality with a pathway from the future to meet it opens a wide gate. In the west the game of chess is played 7, 8 moves ahead… but in the east the game of “go” has millions of potential moves, and a skilled player must hold not just the board in his mind, but the near infinite possible threats his opponent may make… a move here, a wall here, an attack there, and in each of those anticipate to move the strategy… Know your opponents mind as Musashi wrote… knowing his tendencies, it isn’t hard… will he speak or be silent, test his anger, test his empathy, what are his drives, (is it success, recognition), most men never meet the moment of their death, some walk up to it in meditation, and find the path and back away… the answer to avoidance is peace… serenity, to know every fight is never needed put down his bladed weapons. There is no victory in battle, only survivors… no one wants to survive we want to live. free of the shackles that bind us to our mother earth.

Serenity, to many is the calm… The peace… The Zen… The idea of the word serene for most people inspires images of a clear blue crystalline lake with the sun rising over snow capped mountains in the distance, or meditating on the front porch of a lodge on a hillside overlooking vast fields of tall seeding grass and an evergreen Forrest behind… For me those images are ones of solitude and they caused fear… Fear of where my mind takes me when I am alone… For me, My zen… my serenity has always been more than mundane scenery…

Serenity is thumping bass as I lose myself in dance. Serenity has been found with 300lbs of torque between my legs stepping on a motorcycle pedal and downshifting to 3rd while popping the clutch with my left hand and opening up the throttle all the way with hard turn of the wrist as the world screams into a blurry tunnel of color streaking past at 180 mile per hour, when all you hear is a high pitched scream and you aren’t sure if it’s the engine or your soul making it… Serenity has been catching that 8 foot shelf of a wave and popping up on a surf board, dropping down the face using every ounce of muscle memory to stay upright as your stomach is left behind hovering above you, as the wave crashes over your head and all sound is stripped from the world, while running a hand along the glass as you tuck and hope you can accelerate fast enough to beat the curl before it collapses over you and crushes you into the depths to fight for the surface before the air in your blood turns to acid… Serenity has been stepping through the ropes of a boxing ring with a larger, more experienced opponent standing in the other corner pacing back and forth like a hungry wolf with anger in his eyes… As I’m breathing in, bending forward in a leg stretch in an attempt to exhale the anxiety from my body before I willfully enter a contest to test my speed and stamina and sheer willpower against his. Serenity has been swan diving from a cliff, penetrating a narrow space between a rocky wedge to avoid impact with the sharp walls. It has been dropping into a 10 foot concrete half pipe on a plank and four wheels, and soaring up the other side to catch air before returning to the base… Serenity, has never meant calm… Zen has never meant peace… Serenity has always been moments when adrenaline and noise and the fight instinct has kicked in and forced me into the present moment, where all my focus and all my effort forces the past to run from memory, when fear for imminent death in the future is suddenly needed to be counted in microseconds instead of days or weeks or years, where decisions need to be made by instinct instead of thought… My mind is cleared, focused, tuned… no mind… i rely on muscle memory in those moments when the peaceful warrior emerges from within me… a tornado under command of sheer strength leads to insight and to calm.

Before you…

This morning I woke up in your arms, and suddenly serenity had found a definition of peace… I found myself in your fitted embrace, suddenly adrift in blissful happiness, complete zen, totally centered and at one with the universe, and for the first time I found that moment without risking death… Discovered it without drowning out the screaming of my soul, without forcing my mind to focus on the next millisecond… My fears for the future gone, my regrets from the past set adrift in the ocean of time… My heart became that glassy lake reflecting the heavens of your spirit and the mountains of your love in it… My soul became the evergreen trees gently swaying in the winds of your soul and warmed by your light… In that moment I found true serenity, true rest… The pivot of the universe where all motion stops, all fear subsides and all anxiety vanishes into dust and is washed away by just being next to you.

You are my serenity. My first and only true peace.

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